| I'm back. |
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| 06:49pm 31/07/2004 |
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The rumors of my demise have been greatly exaggerated.
Like the vaunted phoenix, I rise from the ashes once again.
Hello, lovelies. |
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Read 8 - Post |
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| Just checking in. |
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| 07:41pm 28/12/2002 |
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Recent news from the Cole front:
- Met my sister at Union Station today; nothing monumental about that, except that her lousy husband couldn't be there to meet her because he still had to pick up tortilla chips for his Saturday poker night. In unfortunate toilet news, I had to use the bathroom at the station and found five out of the eight stalls had unflushed toilets - including one that was apparently used by a patron that felt the need to empty his electric shaver into the bowl. It looked like a chipmunk had exploded in there. C'mon, people, FLUSH THE F***ING TOILET. It's real easy, you just toggle the little silver handle. You can even use the bottom of your shoe if you're afraid of getting cooties.
- I owe Blockbuster $32 in late fees because, like a moron, I returned the case for Austin Powers: Goldmember and left the DVD in my player. I didn't even think I got my $4 worth when I rented, much less paying 30 bucks. Much banging of my head against the wall ensued.
- In the WAY too much information dept. (children and the squeamish may want to skip over this one): I went for my annual physical Friday and the doctor informed me that I have varicocele (and have probably had it since puberty). This condition of the testicles afflicts about 20% of the male population, and it's summed up pretty much as an enlargement of the main vein that parallels the vas deferens. In other words, the left side of my scrote is real big. Lovely, huh? It gets better... a majority of the males afflicted with this have drastically reduced sperm count, which probably explains why my high school girlfriend and I had unprotected sex about a thousand times and she never got preggers. Thank God for bad genes to make up for my incessant stupidity.
- Was relieved to know that Nicolas Cage had, in fact, NOT died in a helicopter crash. I was really looking forward to Con Air 2.
That about wraps it up for today. Join me at 11 when I discuss how one of my legs is shorter than the other. |
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Read 26 - Post |
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| ugh. |
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| 04:42pm 18/12/2002 |
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Well, turns out there are two strains of flu virus making the rounds up here - one is your garden variety sniffling, sneezing, coughing, aching, stuffy-head, fever, you can't rest virus, the other is sort of a stomach virus that lets you get reacquainted with every little detail of your bathroom. Lucky me, I've been fighting off the latter one for the past two days.
I'm weak, I'm crampy, and I'm grouchy. And to top it all off, I'm way behind schedule on my illustrations.
Whee. |
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Read 6 - Post |
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| 06:14pm 13/12/2002 |
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I think I'm going to go crawl in a hole and die now. |
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Read 4 - Post |
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| crap. |
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| 06:06pm 13/12/2002 |
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Well, it looks like I've fucked up again.
Ailsa, I'm publicly apologizing. I'm a total dickweed. |
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Read 8 - Post |
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| Just call me a snowbunny |
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| 04:50pm 07/12/2002 |
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Since Julia doesn't have an exam until Wednesday, it looks as though she'll be able to go to West Virginia with her parents on a ski trip tomorrow and Monday. And that means so will I! Woo HOOO!
I haven't been skiing in ages, though, and my leg still isn't a hundred percent since the accident. I'm not sure if I'll brave the slopes, but they have a killer toboggan slope there. Skiing is fun and all, but sliding downhill at 40 miles an hour completely out of control is what I love. |
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Read 14 - Post |
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| I am so dead... |
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| 01:56pm 06/12/2002 |
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.. they're going to have to bury me twice.
I stayed out all day long yesterday, playing in the snow and visiting with friends, and now I'm so far behind in my illustrations that I'll be lucky if I even see daylight again.
Freelancing is so hard sometimes. It's just so tough to get motivated when you're free to just go outside and play whenever you want. Still, better than a desk job, lemmetellya.
Hope everyone's having a big ol' happy. |
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| bleh. |
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| 01:41pm 04/12/2002 |
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I feel like utter crud today. I think I ate something bad last night... Julia and I went out for Chinese after she finished up at the learning center and we both had a bad reaction to it. I could hardly sleep from feeling like I was going to puke all night long.
Now I'm sitting here freezing to death because it's cold as balls outside and my heat isn't so good.
Whee. |
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Read 18 - Post |
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| *sniff* |
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| 02:42pm 03/12/2002 |
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Yahoo must be down... how else could I account for no emails from anyone.
I am sad. |
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Read 1 - Post |
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| confessions of an apple addict. |
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| 08:33pm 29/11/2002 |
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Hello, my name is Cole and I'm in love with Janie Porche.
For those of you out there unfamiliar with the recent unhealthy obsession over the "Apple switch girls", let me clue you in. I'm sure you've all seen Apple Computer's every-man switch commercials, where the average meatball off the street is interviewed as to why they gave up Windows and came into the light. Well, two of those commercials feature young women who are currently getting more hits on google than Jenna Jameson. 15-year-old Ellen Feiss is one of them; Janie Porche, the little darlin', is the other.
I had absolutely no idea this phenomenon existed until I did my first search for Janie Porche. I got a bajillion hits; most were harmless little posts about how cute she is, etc., but some of them are pretty, well, shocking. If you don't believe me, go look on Google for yourselves.
Sorry to waste your bandwidth, but I had to share. After all, one of the 12 steps is admitting you have a problem to a group of your peers.
My name is Cole and I'm in love with Janie Porche. |
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Read 8 - Post |
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| get stuffed |
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| 08:40pm 27/11/2002 |
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Well, I'm headed out for the night. Just wanted to wish everyone out there a very happy Thanksgiving. Enjoy your turkey or tofurkey or soykey or whatever you'll be eating.
Gobble gobble! |
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Post |
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| Off to the show |
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| 06:43pm 26/11/2002 |
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Ok, I'm leaving to see a play with Julia. Be back afterwhile. Miss me. |
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| is it real or is it LiveJournal? |
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| 04:10pm 26/11/2002 |
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Wow... I love it when the happenings within our little virtual community spill over into "real" life. It's fascinating that, somehow, our minds seem to filter out the fact that behind each of these journals is a living, breathing, feeling individual. I have on ongoing theory that LJ can sometimes be a rampant breeding ground for potential pathological liars, wannabe serial stalkers and for those who are just a few fries short of a Happy Meal. A recent post by ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif?v=88.8) shadesong confirms as much:
http://www.livejournal.com/talkread.bml?journal=shadesong&itemid=513724
My heart goes out to you 'song. |
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Read 30 - Post |
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| Bond. James Bond. |
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| 03:58pm 26/11/2002 |
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I talked Julia into going to see Die Another Day with me yesterday afternoon, and let me just say that I think she got more out of it than I did. Even though she couldn't hear all the big explosions, etc. she really enjoyed the movie. I, on the other hand, being a big Bond fanatic, found the plot to be a little lacking. I thoroughly enjoyed the classic Bond references - all the old gadgets in Q's workshop, the classic tricked-out Bond car, the evil madman's giant ice-fortress - but there were some points in the movie where I just had to say WTF? It was as if whoever wrote this one was smoking crack after every other page.
I won't discuss the points I found very weird on here since some of you may not have seen it yet. Let me just say that despite the oddball storyline, it's worth the price of admission to see two supercars dueling on ice.
Oh, and one other thing: raise your hand if you think Halle Berry sucks. I see my hand raised... are there others? |
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